Lets forget the negatives!

Struggle...

Saturday, January 26, 2008 ( 3:40 AM )

Struggle...

Dunno y I feel the anxiety in me and feel tt I am struggling all along.

Been feeling tired more than before,keep slping during lectures and all recently...=(
I juz cant help it,though slp for long hours,I still feel very tired and fall into sleep within minutes.

I feel so hopeless.
I appear to be and wanted to be strong,but I realised that I am not tt strong after all.
I dunno how long I can hang in there,I juz dunno when I will collapse.

I also double confirm that I cant trust anyone totally.
Not even one.
Cos I dun even trust myself.

Ppl say diff things in front of diff ppl,ppl do diff thing from wat they say,ppl express wat they say differently too.
In the process of wat they did,they hurt some ppl.

It's painful.
It's confusing.
It's not at all trustworthy.

Juz when I pick up little of my confidence,changing myself from anti-social to become a joker to mingle with the rest,I found tt it's hard n tired.
And at some moment,I hate myself n also feel tt I am juz tt extra among them,the insignificant presence...

And juz when I tot I gt many TRUE frenz,I realised that all are HI-BYE frenz.

Sometimes,feels tt,if I happen to leave the earth to a faraway land,who would even miss or rmb me?

The frenz tt used to be my best frenz and all,we stray further from one another and more like strangers now.

And I rmb wat the MA Lecturer had presented to us a short story,and the moral of the story is somehow like this...

"Those who shits on you may not be your enemy; Those who helped you out of the shit may not be your friends;and if you are in deep shit,it's best to keep your mouth shut."

Very true I think.
Ok lah,stopped emo already,I go to slp le,ltr still got to help out at Muhammadiyah Welfare Home...

Bye...Take Care Everyone...=)

=Jac=